I have been told – too many times to count – that I should share my stories because someone out there will get a laugh, gain some insight, find some comfort. I don’t know if any of that is true, but I love to talk about my so-called life.
I have had some pretty rough days. I have had some pretty fantastic ones too. You see, I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar type 2 illness, with a side of Anxiety and Borderline Personality Disorder. Before the diagnosis my life was spinning out of control. I could not figure out why I did the self destructive things; I knew better, I was SMARTER than that. After the diagnosis I was scared, I thought I was permanently damaged and that there was no hope for me leading a normal life. But life – no matter what shape it is in – still has to be lived.
Every time I tell my stories I learn something new about myself. The chaos that is my brain gets a little bit more controlled. And the people who listen to my stories get some entertainment, as well as confirmation that there is life after a DSM-IV diagnosis.
I have a lifetime time of stories. They include current and past partners, 3 children, siblings, parents, friends, co-workers, enemies, frenemies, complete strangers. My stories come out sometimes in a jumbled torrent of words and images. Sometimes they are an orderly stream. And like Tarantino’s films, they are not in order.
So grab a cuppa, and join me on my journey to being whole.
I’m not off my meds, I’m just experimenting with reality. —ecards.com
Chaotically Controlled 